Who ate all the pies? – Phat XI

As I pen another XI the enchantment is hard to conceal
This ones not from the dressing room, rather the pre match meal

Were talking megastars of the rotund variety
Of gluttonous pie eating notoriety

Gutbusters United on an industrial king size plate
Before we commence, pass the curry sauce mate!

Olive Kahn swears by spare rib with rare beef steak
Whilst eater Shilton recommends 6 carb original cheesecake

Fatty Foulkes blamed Oreo cookies for making him a mound
Flan Molby, fat and round, weighing a million pound

Galloping Puskas attributed his cannon shot to deep cooked fries
Brick Quinnie was not far off, with his bakewell tart surprise

Baked bean Windass, was often seen lunging at the butterkist popcorn
And Steve (twenty) Stone, courted canary pud, with absolutely no scorn

Good to eat Van Diego Maradoner, with extra lashings of Mayo
Brawl Gazza corned beef–flushed with crème de cacao

Thomas the tank Brolin dinked it, smothered in peanut butter
Neville Southalle’s pie melton Mowbray, more often worth a flutter

Matt Le Tiss spread the love, with generous portions of Salami Danish
Veal Ruddock sacked by Swindon, swapping sausage Frankfurter –for the fish

Tum Huddlestone Lardy tardy taa, not really a green giant
Brandy Reid and sausage Bockwurst – compliant, reliant, defiant

Croissant Hartson’s thousand Island dressing lavished on battered bonito
Herculian Dicks likes nothing better than Chipotle chicken burrito

Chicken Kiev-in Pressman, mastered diving into a Burger King quad stacker
Meal Shipperley roasted white meat chicken, topped off with premium pot pie cracker

McDonald Koeman threw a tantrum, to avoid at all costs the steamer
Not to be outdone, he’s joined by a noble, Ronaldo Nazario de creamer

Fromage Gravesen left Madrid because of the poor quality beef sirloin
Adriano though is staying for Caffè Mocha, with whole milk, whipped cream and aloin.

Advance regret to the Ormondroyd cult, although it may sound downright rude
Peter Crouch fanclub, eat away at your hearts, food, glorious food.

© Emdad Rahman - www.football-poems.com