Poem: Video nasty!

Coming soon to a stadium near you, Steve Round Productions brings you a cracker

Roll up for an exclusive screening, of the Old Trafford Chainsaw Massacre

Pre match fans nerves, would it be a dour draw or a goal spree?
But on the pitch the poor lambs got their little boots clogged in ghee
As defeat to Espana led to a horror DVD

Starring -

Benny from Watford, upon sighting the ball he fled
Arms flailing wildly ala Dawn of the dead

Good old G Neville played himself as shop steward
Nasty after game comments had him well and truly skewered

Villa reduced Rio to an imitation of The Wicker Man
Nightmare on Elm Street, screamed the boisterous Stretford clan

Woody the mad axe murderer looked like he'd emerged from a pond
Pinged useless long balls, all into The Beyond

Dependable P Neville's return seemed like a horrid dream
No left sided option left viewers wanting to Scream

Stevie G starred as England's Chief Kaiser
More starring rolesfor the reformed Hellraiser

A non show from Carricko, does Ray Wilkins still exist?
Can't help with your gaping expressions mate, you need an Exorcist

"I can play with Stevie" Lamps was Les Diaboliques
How we all pine for his ruthless goal streak

Boy blunder Phillips epitomised crosses to Vampyr
Ninety more minutes and he would've threatened to perspire

Crouchie had things on mind, had he forgotten the rent?
As Iniesta's strike pushed England into The Descent

Wonderboy Dyer had Roeder of the North East scowling
Pity the rest of the nation were left Howling

On a bleak night Macca's men failed to enthrall
Twelve horror flicks mentioned in this pome, can you spot them all?

(c) Emdad Rahman - 16.02.07
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